Good, positive publicity for the subject, but too narrow and repetitive
Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage by Jenny Block
Book on Amazon | My review on Amazon
3 out of 5 stars
Reviewed August 9, 2009
Ever since I came across Jenny Block’s blog post on the same subject – Open Marriage, I have been wanting to read her book. Finally ordered it on Amazon and read it.
The book is about open relationships, the focal theme being honesty with one’s partner(s) – even if painful at times. It deals with questions of “why open marriage as opposed to separating”, how the author makes it work in her life, the difference between an open relationship and cheating on one’s spouse. There must be a lot of others who quietly live an open marriage without writing about it or exposing themselves to public criticism/debate. The author claims to be a “poster child” for open marriage – in this she has certainly succeeded. The book certainly helps bring to the public view a subject that is controversial and mostly unaccepted by society.
But I must say overall, it was somewhat disappointing – it did not seem to have much value-add over her blog post – almost everything in the book has already been said in the blog, in a more concise way. The book could have be edited to probably half its length.
Besides, it is a single person’s (or at best a couple’s) point of view on how they are going about an alternative life-style. The author states this clearly – it is just the way she has defined open marriage – based on the “rules” acceptable to her husband and herself. What would have been a better treatment of the subject is research and exploration of other definitions of open relationships – a broader view.
In the book, she talks about how not to expose her 10 year old daughter to unnecessary details of her sex life. Fair enough. But how does she reconcile writing a book about her open marriage, and insisting on honesty on all sides, and not exposing her child to her book? I am curious about what the author would tell her daughter – if she intends to stay honest, she cannot very well hide this book from her daughter. Will the daughter reads this book? Will the author explain herself to the child?
And finally, the author has now settled into a single “other” relationship outside her marriage – with another woman. Her girl-friend at the time of writing is not comfortable with her having other sexual relationships (other than her husband)… this somewhat takes the air out of open marriage, where now she has to abide by two people’s rules. It may not seem like that to the people concerned – they want to do what they’re doing, by choice.. but what does it say about open marriage? Nothing much really.
Anybody know of other books that have a broader perspective on the subject of open relationships, please comment.
